Thinks on Things

A gathering of ponderings…

Reliving Elementary School

After feeling completely humiliated (although no one would know) I think I may be breaking through to recognize the benefits of counseling. Yes, I see a counselor. That’s because I’m not perfect and I have problems and I’m messed up.

So my mentor saw fit to give me the stoopidest thing ever. It’s so childish and elementary that I felt my intelligence insulted. I was given a piece of paper with about a hundred different feeling words. Yes, that’s right, an emotional chart. The only thing missing (fortunately) was the little smiley faces and frowny faces to go with each emotion…

It’s taken almost 2 weeks to break down my resistance to this simple page of nonsense and realize that it was for the best because I have a very hard time putting my feelings into words. Worse than a typical male… I see now that it is actually a helpful tool and it was not meant to debase my self-esteem. Hopefully this is a step in breaking down some of my barriers in trusting.

Baby steps to the door, baby steps out of the door, baby steps into the hallway…

Ironically, I don’t have this chart with me at the moment so I am really at a loss to describe how I feel at the moment. Maybe lost, exhausted, and frustrated.


February 6, 2007 - Posted by | All My Thinks

1 Comment »

  1. […] have not yet been able to think on this vision without being overcome with a rush of full scale emotions, good and bad. Some of these emotions provide a sense of simple peace, some make me angry. […]

    Pingback by Breaking the Silence « Thinks on Things | July 4, 2007

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: